I Hate To Say I Told Her So...

...But I TOLD that instructor that I wasn’t very good with plants when she gave it to me…

Does anyone know how to save a nearly dead…um…whatever plant this is? I don’t WANT it to die. I water it. Admittedly, it’s not in the sunshine, but that is because the putting it in the sunshine would put it in plain sight of said instructor when she comes into the office, and I don’t want her to see that I’m torturing the poor thing.

Prank Calling: It's Not Just For Non-Super Stars Anymore

Considering that I have been in school or working pretty much all of my life...I have never been much of a daytime TV watcher. With that in mind, I can probably count on both hands the number of times I've watched Oprah Winfrey over the years. Still, the fact that I've never been a fan of her show doesn't prevent me from following the timeless piece of wisdom that:

"When Oprah Calls...You Answer."

At least, I TRY.

You see, Oprah calls me from time to time here at work, but every time I answer...there's nobody there. The first time it happened, I thought for sure that the call had been dropped but that she would call back because she had heard about my awesomeness, (I mean, it's all over the grapevine) and she really wanted to give me my big break. (My big break into what? I don't know. But it's Oprah. If she wants to give you a break...she will do it!) Well...she's called back, alright...repeatedly...but only to torture me with hang-ups and/or dead air.

How immature is that? I can't believe that she has nothing better to do with her time than to prank call me...most recently about five minutes ago. Does she think I don't know it's her? I'm getting tired of her crap...and I worry that the down time brought upon by her upcoming retirement will only increase her ridiculous shenanigans.

I have complained to my colleagues many times about this nuisance...but have been met with, if you can believe it, skepticism. So I took a picture of the caller ID as proof:
Oprah...if you're reading this...(and I'm SURE you are)...give it up. I'm hip to your game, and quite frankly, I'm tired of it.

Unless you really HAVE heard of my awesomeness and are hoping to give me my big break. If that's the case...you have my number.

HAPPY SUPER BOWL SUNDAY!

Let's Go, Colts!

(Yes, that IS a Peyton Manning finger puppet that I made this afternoon. It's probably my most impressive craft project of all time. Seriously.)

I Can See Clearly Now (Sort Of)

Last night I was over at Kristi's house, and one of my contacts was bothering me. I went into the bathroom, took some contact solution off the shelf, and took my contact out. After rinsing it thoroughly, I went to put it back in. As soon as the contact barely touched my eye, I almost had a heart attack. It was burning SOOOO much. Honestly it felt like I had poured rubbing alcohol in my eye. From like, one drop of the liquid. It just kept burning and burning and burning. I cannot put into words how much it hurt. But it hurt...A LOT.

Turns out, that instead of saline solution, I had cleaned my contact off with this:
Looks like contact solution, right? Well…I failed to notice this warning on the side of the bottle:

This solution needs at least six hours to neutralize. Do not rinse lenses with Clear Care® prior to inserting lenses into your eyes. If you want to rinse lenses, use a sterile saline like Softwear® Saline. Do not squirt Clear Care® directly into your eyes.

So…yeah…basically it is solution for overnight cleaning. And I put the unneutralized solution in my eyes. Which makes me think of perm solution. Which, honestly, I think if I’d put perm solution in my eye…it wouldn’t have hurt any more than this did.

So…I rinsed the contact with water, and with regular saline and then put it in my eye. And it STILL felt just as bad. Burn burn burn. You see, because it still hadn’t been six hours. My eye was watering like crazy, and the left side of my face was covered in smeared mascara. I looked like Alice Cooper. I’m so freaking stupid. Finally I just threw the contact out…and got a spare one out of my purse and put it in. And it felt fine...(as fine as it could feel, under the circumstances)…but my eye still hurts. This morning it’s still bright red.

So...as a public service announcement...don't put non-saline solution in your eyes. Now you know. And now I know. And thankfully I got the glam rock makeup off my face. You have to count the little blessings, after all.

What's In A Name?

My name is Janine. I don't feel like it's THAT hard of a name to say or to understand. Juh-neen. Pretty simple. That being said, here is a list of names that I have been called while in my current job...many of them more than once:

Jamie

Jeanette

Shirley

Daneen

Jolene

Susan

Janie

Jan

Doreen

AND...the name that I was JUST called...which prompted this impromptu post:

Jermaine.


Seriously?

Come ON.

Football Mania

So...I feel bad when I stop by the blog and see that anyone has visited that day...only to find that my most recent post is over a month old. Sorry about that...I'll try to do better. Which, of course, I say all the time...and don't always follow through with...but...take it or leave it.

Lately, I've been kind of engrossed in Football...more so than usual. So...to get back in the blogging swing of things...I thought I'd list some awesome football related facts and musings:

**FIRST AND FOREMOST: With a win over our "Border War" rivals, CSU, the Wyoming Cowboys are Bowl Eligible for the first time...well, in a long time. Woohoo!! We've had a couple of really frustrating games this season, but I'm so so happy to see it end on a happy note...and if we get a Bowl Game, that will be the icing on the cake. Most signs point to us heading to the New Mexico Bowl and playing Fresno State. Kristi and I discussed the possibility of jetting down to Albuquerque to watch the game. This might depend on if I spend ALL of the money in my bank account on Christmas presents in the next day or so. Which is a real possibility. Seriously.

**I have found myself engrossed in the NFL season this year more than I've ever been in the past. Traditionally, I've been more of a College football fan...but this year, the NFL has got me excited. And excited in more ways than the usual "Holy Crap, Peyton Manning is SO HOT" ways. I am really getting wrapped up in the games every week. This may be due to the fact that I've been included in the office pool this year, and don't want to make a fool of myself...but who's to say? You never know when a bug is going to bite you, right?

**In the aforementioned office pool, I won this past week's grand prize of $7.00. That's right...there IS a decimal after that first digit. I didn't win 70 dollars. I didn't win 700 dollars. I won 7 dollars. Is there any wonder why the stakes of this pool have motivated me to be so NFL-savvy all of the sudden? Yeah...it's pretty obvious.

**Over Thanksgiving my family decided to play flag football for the first time. Well...it was the first time I've been involved anyway. I think I only touched the ball one time, and I never tackled anyone...but I'm pretty sure that I am going to get called up to the FFML (flag football major league) any time now. I mean...I only threw one interception in the whole game. I think that's better than Tom Brady can say about HIS performance this week.

**Is it just me, or does Sean Payton, head coach of the New Orleans Saints, look JUST like Kenny Chesney? I mean...it's uncanny. No...I don't know how many yards anyone rushed for in their game against the Patriots...but the Payton/Chesney connection haunted me all night.

**Bill Belichick might want to re-think his sweatshirts with the sleeves cut off for next week. When you're playing an undefeated season, you can make all the horrible fashion decisions you want...but when you're falling apart like nobody's business, you should at least try to LOOK good on the sidelines...since your coaching decisions are looking HORRIBLE in the game. Just a thought.

That might be it. I could go on and on about my love for the game, I'm sure...but I've got $7.00 burning a hole in my pocket, and I might just have to jet to Vegas instead of Albuquerque to spend it...I'm feeling lucky!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

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