An Open Letter to All You "Scooters"

Hello, Mister Scooter Driver. I get the fact that you think you’re pretty cool on that scooter. Maybe you drive it because you’re trying to get good gas mileage. Maybe you’re driving it because you can’t afford a car. Maybe you think it’ll do until you can get the dough together to get a real motorcycle. As judgmental as I usually am, I have never had a problem with scooters…really. While it has never been a mode of transport I’ve been drawn to, I say live and let live. To those who choose to drive them, I’ve always said, "Scooter Drivers of the World…Scoot On!"

If, however, you are going to ride that scooter…and you can’t get the little bugger going above 19.5 miles per hour…while going down-freaking-hill…on a major, well traveled, road…then I’m going to start having a problem with the scooter. There are side streets for a reason, Bub.